Withhold Nothing.

As children of God, if we could all be transparent, there is always something that we withhold from God. We may not like to admit it. But I believe that God takes us in uncomfortable spaces to reveal what has replaced him. Unfortunately, the very things we love so much are hard to give to God. Could it be out of fear? Could it be because you're not ready? Could it be that you don't trust him nor have faith? We know that because he is God, at times, he will ask us to do things that won't make sense, that will cost you everything you love, even if it is the only thing you have. But would you abort his command due to your uncertainty? Would you rather be disobedient because you can't see the full picture? What has God asked you to give to him that you are having a hard time surrendering?

In Part I, I begin to share my testimony, and how God changed my perspective once I truly gave what I withheld from him. And I chose this specific space, in my personal life, to talk about out of obedience to God because it was simply my strongest one. I pray that you be blessed and know that you are not alone.

Testimony: 

I am a die-hard Michael Jackson fan. For quite some time, in the process of growing in my relationship with God, I had been feeling a huge tug on my heart that left my spirit uneasy, to the point where I needed to seek God for wisdom and discernment because I did not understand it, I knew that God had no problem with me being a fan, but I wanted to go deeper about those feelings. Whenever I would watch or listen to him, afterwards and sometimes during I would feel uneasy again. Now, I'm not just any fan. (or should I say basic) I'm a Moonwalker. (Moonwalkers is the name of his fan club, for those who are not aware!) and so I guess you can call that a Michael Jackson Enthusiast (lol), where I find enjoyment in doing research about his life and successful music career, downloading unreleased songs and finding new concert footage that I haven't seen before, there is a lot to that man that keeps me constantly excited. As a singer/songwriter myself, I take notes. He's just my favorite artist, ever. But while all of that is great, there is still an uneasy feeling on the inside and as we all know, God's timing is perfect. 

Sidenote: When you ask God specific questions that are left unanswered, be not dismay, trust that his timing is perfect, and at just the right time, he will answer you with more insight and wisdom, that you probably could not have handled before. Praise him during unanswered questions. 

So, one day, in my quiet time with the Lord, I mentioned to him about those feelings, and it was then the Lord brought to my attention that those feelings were an indication that he was prompting me to give Michael Jackson to him. Me, convicted, mentally did but my heart didn't. So guess what that sounds like? Yep. You guess it. I withheld Michael Jackson from God. Realizing that I had subconsciously made that decision, I proceeded in what I wanted to do, only prolonging what I really wanted. I wanted to really feel God, feel his love, security, and just simply his presence. But whenever I would spend time, it always felt like something was blocking in the middle of trying to be intimate. It was then, I knew what the problem was. Until finally, I surrender. I invited God openly into every space of my life, even the areas I felt I had maybe closed out from him. When I opened myself to him, I decided to truly take a break from Michael Jackson. IN FAITH.

The reason why I said "In Faith" is because I did not think it was possible. I immediately had thoughts of failure. But if you are paying attention, notice how I said "I did not think it was possible" Could that be an indication that I had a stronghold? Could that mean that I was not really ready to let that go because I loved it so much? Due to my uncertainty as to how God was going to deal with it, I was afraid. I had these "false" results in mind that I assumed would come true. I thought God would remove Michael from my life, I would be hard on myself, trying to remove it as if I had enough power to do so,  still going around the shocking true that I really cared about that portion of my life and how it would end up.

But God.... During my break, I read a devotional about Idolatry, and he was talking about different types of Idols. When I came across the "Physical Idol", he said something that immediately gave me confirmation on my spirit. He says.....

"What kind of posters do you have in your bedroom? It is not wrong to celebrate the accomplishments of others. You may really like a certain sports star or entertainer—and that is not necessarily wrong. However, has your mind become filled with their abilities more than it is focused on God?" - (David Peach) (whatchristianswanttoknow.com)

When I read that, I begin to pray, and he told me, "Daughter, My problem is not with you being a fan, my problem is that you have filled yourself up with his abilities, talents, and gifts that has been distracting you from me. How can I fill you with my love when someone else has filled that space in your heart? Someone else's gifts have captured most of your attention." Jesus! I would not have known any of that if I did not take that break. And if we are not careful, we could be deceived in believing that it is okay, not paying attention to our intake. It amazing what happens when you surrender, because when you do, God may now tell you what he thinks verses how you thought, because you simply were obedient to him.

I realized that the abilities Michael Jackson was gifted with became the reason for my strong attachment to him. I admired everything that caused my heart to only see that. It was as if I could not see pass his abilities, that I somehow was lost into them. But through that, I learned balance, to know when to turn it on and off. I learned to not be so hard on myself about anything, but trust in Jesus, and accept that I will always be a huge Michael Jackson fan and that I can't take away what I believe is there for a reason. God knew that was my guy, before I knew that was my guy. (lol) How much intake of him is what's more important. It can't be more intake of him and less of Jesus. Point being is that, God knew I would like the certain things I like and love what I love, and that's okay to say that, but boundaries are very necessary. One of the others things the Holy Spirit said was... "Don't be so hard on yourself, but check yourself."

If that person or thing easily consumes and distracts you from God, and you know it? You gotta check yourself. If you have to physically snap your finger and say, "HEY! Watch it." to get ahold of yourself, do that. We bind that Spirit of Idolatry. 

So as of today, I begin to check myself, to guard my heart, to not allow anything to distract me from my Father, to ask the Holy Spirit to alert me if I get carried away, always be aware of my intake, and to always trust God with every aspect of my life, for by faith, we know that he is always at work. 

What have you filled yourself up with that you did not realize it was rooting on the inside of your heart? That it distracted you from God? I pray against the spirit of Idolatry, for we will not allow any person nor thing to take root in place of God. For God, we know that you're a Jealous God, and we honor your sincere love for us and desiring to have more of us. 

Always remember, God does not have a problem with who your favorite entertainer is, what kind of sports, cars, makeup, whatever you may love or like, he just wants you to be careful into not allowing it to take root into your heart that will cause that person or thing to be placed before him. 

Prayer: Father, I pray that we are through competing with you with other gods in our lives. I pray that we submit our hearts over to you, and to step out on faith on the things that seems impossible to do, for we know that it is impossible to please you without faith. Help us God, to trust you as you work within us, we repent corporately. You're God alone. Our sweet Alpha and Omega. Thank you for the wisdom. Thank you for the Holy Spirit that you instilled in us, to help guide and lead us, to help teach us, to correct us in our wrongdoings, and even reveal deep roots that you desire to get your hands on. Thank you Jesus for Salvation. For we know that because you have overcome the world, we will take heart, trust that we are healed, and believe that because of you, God accepts us into his kingdom. I speak freedom from Idolatry. 

In Jesus Name' Amen. 

"You must not have any other god but me. You must not make for yourself an idol of any kind or an image of anything in the heavens or on the earth or in the sea. You must not bow down to them or worship them, for I, the Lord your God, am a jealous God who will not tolerate your affection for any other gods. I lay the sins of the parents upon their children; the entire family is affected—even children in the third and fourth generations of those who reject me. But I lavish unfailing love for a thousand generations on those who love me and obey my commands."

Exodus 20:3-6 NLT

What happens if I don't read the Bible?

"All Scripture is inspired by God and is useful to teach us what is true and to make us realize what is wrong in our lives. It corrects us when we are wrong and teaches us to do what is right." 2 Timothy 3:16 NLT

Because the bible is what transforms us into Christ's image, helps us understand, believe, and live the truth. What would happen if we did not pick up the bible at all? Could we still be that bold woman of God? Does adding a 15 to 30 minute read of the bible conflicts with your busy schedule? I get that. Some of us maybe want to add reading the bible to their daily routine but can't seem to find the time to squeeze it in. Well today, I want to talk to you all about what happens when you don't read the bible, how important it is to read the bible, and how to not stress yourself out with trying to add reading the bible to your daily schedule. God is with you honey. Let's Begin. 

"What happens if I don't read the Bible?"

1. You will never know who God really is. 

In this life, you will hear many perceptions as to who God is to someone, some stories may come from a place of inspiration and some may come from a place of hurt or anger that they have towards him. If you are unaware of who God is to you, you will begin to believe what others will have to say about him. For example, if someone says that "God is in control of everything." and have experienced a major tragedy in their life, they may believe that because God is in control, he is the reason for several tragedies that have occurred in their life. If you have not done so, I encourage you to watch the movie "The Shack".

To paraphrase, "The Shack" is about a man who blames God for the tragic lost of his youngest daughter. He and his three children went on a camping trip and his youngest daughter went missing  to later find out that she was murdered. That left him heartbroken, giving him the option to blame himself and even God. The highlights of that movie was him meeting with God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit. During his stay, he confesses to God how angry he was for letting his little girl die and later throughout the movie, in the midst of his confessions,  "Wisdom" said to him, "The work of evil isn't God's doing." As I will stop there. If you would like to know/see further details about this amazing movie, I highly recommend that you watch it. It is heart-warming to see God's love and who he is visually.

The saying "The work of evil isn't God doing" gave me the understanding that regardless of what happens tragically to someone we love or even what we see on the news, God still remains good. What do I mean? I mean, that when a tragedy happens, God still has a plan, for all things work together for our good. He uses everything for our good. And that's one of the major keys to knowing who God is, is knowing that he is good at all times, never wanting us to think that he is not in grief amongst those who have been tragically taken away from you. For he griefs with you out of his love for you, wanting to heal you, and let you know that he feels what you feel, that he has never left you. 

With knowing God, you have to come from a place of you figuring out for yourself who God is and what his son Jesus Christ has done for you. That's where reading the bible comes in. Through the bible, you will read numerous stories that will show you how mighty, powerful, and faithful God is. You will learn to know who Jesus Christ is and why he sent his son to die on the cross for you. You will begin to see the pure truth as to why God loves you so much, for God's love runs so deep that it is indescribable. For God is larger than life, and he desires for to be secure in his love. For starters, here are a few scriptures to help you know who God is.

“For this is how God loved the world: He gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life. - John 3:16 NLT

But you, O Lord, are a God of compassion and mercy, slow to get angry and filled with unfailing love and faithfulness. - Psalm 86:15 NLT

Understand, therefore, that the Lord your God is indeed God. He is the faithful God who keeps his covenant for a thousand generations and lavishes his unfailing love on those who love him and obey his commands. - Deuteronomy 7:9 NLT 

For the Lord your God is living among you. He is a mighty savior. He will take delight in you with gladness. With his love, he will calm all your fears. He will rejoice over you with joyful songs.” - Zephaniah 3:17 NLT

2. You will never know who you are in Christ. 

Identity crisis is real, its tough to walk around pretending to be someone that you are not, and trying to maintain that mask when it grows old. You overwhelm yourself trying to keep up with society, because society is never satisfied with anything. It stays thirsty for more. Once something new comes out, it will be waiting for the next thing. It's like its never really fulfilled with what it has. And if we can pause there parenthetically, how many of us can say we are not fulfilled within? That we truly don't know who we were destined to be. Well, I can encourage you in saying that in reading the bible, it will help prune off bad fruits, and produce good fruits. (Matthew 7:18), it will enlighten you with how God loves his daughters and what is precious to him about a woman. And in that process, you will begin to feel the shift into the image of Christ, really knowing who you are and whose you are. 

Christ is the perfect example of who we are to be like, he has made the way for us to be reconcile with God to grow into an relationship with him, so why not, read now, to be expose to all God has for you, and get a view of how God sees you. Rather you believe it or not, it is a beautiful experience, rather challenging, for the sake of God's removal of what is not like him that may be in you. The way God has designed you is just awesome that can't be explained into words, Christ lives within you and desires to shine his light through you wherever you go. Here are a few scriptures that can help you be encouraged with the process of knowing who you are in Christ. 

"She is clothed in strength and dignity and she laughs without fear of the future." - Proverbs 31:25

"She is energetic and strong, a hard worker." - Proverbs 31:17 

For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago. - Ephesians 2:10 NLT.

But you are not like that, for you are a chosen people. You are royal priests, a holy nation, God’s very own possession. As a result, you can show others the goodness of God, for he called you out of the darkness into his wonderful light. - 1 Peter 2:9 NLT 

Dear friends, now we are children of God, and what we will be has not yet been made known. But we know that when Christ appears, we shall be like him, for we shall see him as he is. - 1 John 3:2 NLT

3. You will never really know how to fight back the enemy. 

When you know who God is for you and know who you are in Christ, be mindful that the enemy will come to attack. He will attack your faith and identity, he will make sure that you stumble some way some how. But how can we resist him? How must we really know how to fight back in times of attacks? The Word of God. God's Word is the only thing that can defeat the enemy, even when the enemy quotes scripture, we are able to rely on Christ's strength and not allow him to run over our lives. Our lives are always being watched by the enemy, he hates the idea of us living for God, he does not like that we have turned from our worldly wicked ways to now knowing our identity, he is angry. But who cares? You have the ability to fight back with what God put in you. Know that God is on your side, fighting your battles, easily knocking Satan off of his traps. 

The Word prepares you for the attack, it gives you the power to speak against that demon. To rebuke anything that Satan tries to destroy or take away from you. I want you to take a moment to remember the things that have been stolen from you, that you know the enemy took from you, and you are tired of him having a field day with your mind, heart, and soul. He's trying to give you reasons to stop trusting God to restore. If you feel like you have fail some attacks, I want to encourage you to pick back up your sword of armor and fight back the next time he shows up. You're strong. Give him a piece of who you are with Christ standing next to you, ready to help you in battle. Let him know that you are the head and not the tail. You are above and never beneath. You are a Child of God. 

But to only get to that stage, we must first read his word, meditate on it, and prepare for battle. God will always send test and trials for the benefit of strengthen your faith. God sees you as strong and mighty, and even when we can't see it yet, he is patience enough to walk us through that journey of realizing just how strong and mighty we really are in him. Once the Word is implanted into our hearts, we are set to never be fearful during a battle again. Sometimes, we may be weaken, but we don't always have to stay there. We know where we can gather our armor and prepare for battle.
 Here are a few scriptures on how to prepare for the attack of the enemy. 

But in that coming day,  no weapon turned against you will succeed. You will silence every voice raised up to accuse you.These benefits are enjoyed by the servants of the Lord; their vindication will come from me. I, the Lord, have spoken! - Isaiah 54:17 NLT 

 A final word: Be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on all of God’s armor so that you will be able to stand firm against all strategies of the devil. For we are not fighting against flesh-and-blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places. - Ephesians 6:10-12

Therefore, put on every piece of God’s armor so you will be able to resist the enemy in the time of evil. Then after the battle you will still be standing firm.14 Stand your ground, putting on the belt of truth and the body armor of God’s righteousness. - Ephesians 6:13-14

Stay alert! Watch out for your great enemy, the devil. He prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour. Stand firm against him, and be strong in your faith. Remember that your family of believers all over the world is going through the same kind of suffering you are. - 1 Peter 5:8-9 NLT

For those who are wanting to read more of the bible:

I get it honey, your schedule is hectic. But you really do desire to spend time with God and reading his word. One thing I would encourage you to do is take some time to sit and write out your entire schedule, and examine it honesty. See if there is room to have quiet time, for God honors every minute that you give him, as long as it is intentional. Your long for more of God is not overlooked, he is honored and is making a way for you right now by opening up more of your schedule to spend time with him. The greatest thing for you to do is be in constant prayer even when you know it is hard to have that quiet time. Rather that be you going to the bathroom to pray for a few minutes or in your car. God is with you everywhere you go and hears you as you speak to him. Always remember that "You make time for who you love." 

For those who don't have much of a overbooked schedule, be grateful for the little time God has given you, and dive into his word, pray, growing deeper into your relationship with him. Every minute counts, especially with God. We learn to value breaks, because when you are having a bad day, that break is the time to talk to God in needing his strength to finish the rest of the day. One moment with God can change your whole day.

 For those who may have a lot of time on their hands, definitely use that time God has given you too. Instead of feeling discouraged during whatever you may be waiting on God for, stir yourself up in the Holy Spirit, reading his word to keep yourself encouraged in his promises, and of course growing in him and with him, so that when God sends you out, you will be prepare to face life that lies in front of you. No matter what, be encouraged to know that the bible will always be accessible to you, as God lives through his powerful word. 

For the word of God is alive and powerful. It is sharper than the sharpest two-edged sword, cutting between soul and spirit, between joint and marrow. It exposes our innermost thoughts and desires. Hebrews 4:12 NLT

wordless groans

"In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans." - Romans 8:26 NIV

Has your circumstances ever been so tough on you that when you go to God to pray, you're left speechless? You can't describe the way you're feeling and all you're left with in that moment is your tears? Have you ever felt like you couldn't pray or talk to God the way you wanted to and it discouraged you? As if you thought that God could only hear you one-way, which is from your voice? 

"Wordless Groans" are so profound to God and some of us may feel that it is a hinderance because we think talking "all the time" is the way for God to clearly hear us. Our minds are stuck on a one-way communication. Because he is God, his way of hearing us is far beyond our knowledge of how we think he is suppose to hear us. God hears your thoughts, your heart, and even your tears are words to him. You are in a place where God completely understands you when you are restrained to pour out your heart to him. You are in the same place I was in too, honey. 

I can recall quiet times I would have with the Lord and it would bother me when I was not able to talk to him the way I wanted to, my circumstances was so heavy on my heart that I didn't know where to begin, so that I could start to cast all my cares and worries onto him. I got discouraged but immediately God reminded me that the Holy Spirit intercedes on our behalf when we don't know what to pray for. We are weak, but he is strong. We are lost, but we found ourselves in him. 

I praised God, with tears in my eyes, for knowing that you don't have to always verbally speak for him to understand you, for him to work on your behalf, and for him to be with you. Because he will never leave nor forsake you, know that he will never misunderstand you. He created you. Everything you're going through was pre-planned and already recorded in his books before you were born. (Psalm 139:16)

The best way to pour your heart out to God when words fail is to write them out. Journaling is a way to connect with God deeper than you could imagine. When longing for God's voice, God wants us to open our minds about how we can hear him and how he can hear us. Writing out your prayers is enough for God to answer them. You may wonder, "Okay God, I wrote out my prayers to you, how do I know that you heard them?." Honey, God is faithful to hear whatever you direct to him, if your mind and heart is intentionally set on to talk to him, that catches his attention. You always got his attention, he always desires to speak to you and wants to help you. 

Your circumstances are a "brush off the shoulder" "piece of cake" to God. So when you write out your prayers, believe that he heard you, learn to trust God with his timing with answering them. I knew that since "God takes care of everything I have no control over" why would I constantly meditate on my circumstances? The enemy thinks he is clever with making you believe that God can't hear you. Liar. You can sit here right now, reading this, and know that your thoughts are heard by the Lord. 

Never get discouraged if you try to talk to him and it isn't working, it's okay, Thank God for his Holy Spirit interceding for you. Thank him for being the Father that cares for you and everything that hurts, bothers, and overwhelms you. God wants you to believe that he can hear you. To sit there in silence, waiting expectantly, is enough for God to hear your heart clearly calling out to him. 

The next time, you're restrained to speak, be at peace with knowing that God still hears you either way. Right now, you may be unable to speak, it's okay, trust that you will be able to one day and your words will be flowing nonstop, but until then, still sit in his presence and rest gently. God is so perfect in all of his ways, and always remember that God hears more than you can imagine. 

Broken: On the Inside

Are you letting your outward beauty cover for your inner character? 

"Don't be concerned about the outward beauty of fancy hairstyles, expensive jewelry, or beautiful clothes. You should clothe yourself instead with the beauty that comes from within, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is so precious to God." 1 Peter 3:3 NLT 

Our outward beauty is the norm to cover for our inner character, it is the dismissal to our inner struggles that eventually pro-longs us really getting to know who we truly are within. 

Where am I going with this? Let's tackle some things first. 

1.  The use of make-up. As women, we love make-up, it enhances our beauty, (for it is its job to do so) it makes us feel just as confident as we should be without it. But please understand that make-up was never designed to be a void-filler. It simply cannot, and will not take the place that only Jesus Christ was destined to do. I get it, you're ashamed to see the truth, admit the struggles, yes, you hate that your attitude isn't as pretty as your make-up, but you have to face that reality. You have to admit that you've been hiding from yourself and from God. If you ever dreaded putting on make-up base on the feelings inside of you, that's the Holy Spirit, encouraging you to no longer ignore that. Listen. 

If you use make-up to make up feel confident because naturally you don't, feel wanted, or to fulfill a specific intention that surely isn't God's best for you? I encourage you to: 

• Fast from make-up. Put it in another room, so that you won't be tempted to wear any. 
• Spend time in God's word, allowing him to reassure you where your true beauty comes from. 
• Take some time to learn how to embrace your natural looks, encouraging yourself in the mirror, saying things like "You're beautiful!" "You don't need make-up to make you feel beautiful!" 

2. Clothing. As women, we love to look a certain way, and most times we would wear specific clothing that would boost our confidence, and set the mood for that day. Don't get me wrong, it is not a problem looking fabulous when you want to, especially if you're a confident women who know who you are and whose you are. But here's the problem. If you've ever dressed a certain way for the attention of a boy? Or from friends who has peer pressured you? Then, there is something on the inside that God wants heal and help reassure you with too. In 1 Timothy 3:9-10, it states "And I want women to be modest in their appearance. They should wear decent and appropriate clothing and not draw attention to themselves by the way they fix their hair or by wearing gold or pearls or expensive clothes. For women who claim to be devoted to God should make themselves attractive by the good things they do."  God's definition of his daughter's appearances is modesty. We cannot easily lose sight of God's well pleased appearance of us by trying to keep our closet tight and up-to-date for the intentions to please someone other than him. Sis, you do not have to uncover yourself for men who God didn't even want you to make it pass "hello" with. You do not have to feel peer pressure to buy expensive clothing to blend in. You are just fine honey, and I pray you're okay with it. If not:

•  Ask God to help heal your heart from depression of trying to over-dress to impress. 
• Ask God to help you start honoring him with your body, dressing in a way that is pleasing to him and not caring what others may think or feel. 
• Ask God to give you wisdom, helping you clean out your closet, getting rid of clothes that were a distracting and attracting men that God didn't send. (sidenote: Be encouraged to know that the man God has for you won't lust after your appearance, but will be attracted by the things you do as you're devoted to God, he will see fruit that helps him to seek forth marriage with you because of the God in you." (For women who claim to be devoted to God should make themselves attractive by the good things they do")
• Your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit and because you're a Daughter of the King, I pray that you no longer seek for attention nor approval from anyone. 

So, back to my question: Are you letting your outward beauty cover for your inner character? 

 All materialistic things such as make-up, jewelry and even our clothes and shoes has become our main focus because we just don't want to face the reality of our "Broken: On the Inside." Is it because we've got so accustomed to the latest of what the world has to offer? I've learned that the more we are influenced by the world's expectations, the more we seek to be immune to the system, totally abandoning our inner character. Our inner character is far more important to God than our outward appearance. Yes, God gives us specific instructions on how to honor him with our appearance (as previously stated before) but God is looking at your heart. He works from the inside out, not the other way around. He sees that your heart is broken, and you're constantly dismissing your brokenness. He doesn't want to leave you in that position, but the more we lack in being transparent with him, the more we pro-long Jesus interceding for our healing. I promise you, everything on the outside will follow as is, because of what's on the inside. Your inner character is so important to him because it reflects your outward appearance. Beautiful appearances doesn't cure bad attitudes. What's on the inside of you will show, clear as day. 

God is in the business of working on his children always, especially if they are called according to his purpose. When he desires to show you who you truly are in Christ, he first exposes who you tried to be. And as he shows you that, be transparent enough to admit that those were your heart's intentions. Now God has something to work with, and is willing to show you your true inner character as it then, will reflect your outward appearance.  If you're in this position, be encouraged because that is the work of the Lord, doing some major surgery that is all for your good. 

So today, I pray for you. I pray that you ask God to give you the wisdom and the ability to discern who you've tried to be verse who God has called you to be, that you let God heal you in areas that you daily dismiss, that you are reminded that who you truly are comes from within, and that you no longer carry that brokenness that only Jesus can heal. Trust God for your inner and outward. 

Knowing HIM for you.

"For myself, I want to know you." 

Is it difficult finding him for you? On the regular, you listen to people express their love for/the goodness of God, and as they go on, you're shocked to hear their testimonies and inspired by their transparency, but yet, fail to fully understand who God is for yourself. If we are honest, we struggle to believe his promises and the good he has done in our lives. Why must that be? For yourself, jot down these reminders.

1. For yourself, learn how much God loves you. 

I get it, understanding God's unconditional love takes time even when it is as simple as he made it to be, (hint: Jesus Christ). For (John 3:16)  says "For God loved the world so much that he gave his one and only son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life." Jesus Christ is the ultimate example of how much God truly loves us. And even when there are many examples of God expressing his love for us, Jesus is the main one that interprets his love of how much we matter to him, for he was the one that paid our debts so that we could be made right with God to now have/build an intimate relationship with him. (2 Corinthians 5:21.) Words can't describe his love, he loved us way before we could ever love him. Let your heart sink into his love. 

2. For yourself, seek him. 

"Many Samaritans from the village believed in Jesus because the woman had said, "He told me everything I ever did! When they came out to see him, they begged him to stay in their village. So he stayed for two days, long enough for many more to hear his message and believe. Then they said to the woman, "Now we believe, not just because of what you told us, but because we have heard him ourselves, now we know that he is indeed the Savior of the world." - John 4:39-42

Such a powerful scripture because it proves that knowing Christ for ourselves is important if we want to get through this thing called life. We may hear about him from others, but in our minds we don't really know who he is until we actually hear him speak to us the same way he spoke to that friend or that family member. Jesus loved to deliver the message that only God instructed him to do. That message is what convinces your heart to believe, to then want to share the same message you've been told. The Samaritan women were phenomenal examples to help us understand that without our own experience we're never fully convinced of how good he is. Get to know the man that is your savior. Let Jesus show you who he really is, for he'll convict but let conviction become your new best friend. God's convictions are great convictions. It's tough to bear but it helps you grow into the person that God has called you to be.  

3. The same God that is good to them, is good to you. 

Do you not believe that God is good to you too? If we are not careful, we'll mistakenly download the comparison game into our hearts and minds. "There is so much good happening in her life, why isn't it happening in mine?" Yes it is sweetheart, you're just too focus on someone else's life to see it. What God is doing for you, is for you. God works in ways where he reminds you of the things that he has brought you from and how you've overcame the hardships. Pay attention to those moments and Thank God because he has really been good. Believe that God can do wonders in your life and never ask him to duplicate another person's life for you, because it surely won't happen. He created you to be different, as I'm sure he did the same for the other person. You must know in your heart that God is writing your story and will fulfill all of his promises for your life. For yourself, know that he is good. For he is perfect in all of his ways. 

For God desires your heart, he sees that you peek around the corner and you'll continue as if he does not see you. You can never hide from a omnipresent God. God understands the position of your heart and your desire for change/understanding of his grace and love. Take that opportunity, God is ready when you are. Know that God is not a God of making everyone the same. He is all about unity, but never creating a person with the exact same DNA, for he created us all uniquely different. We all find out about him in our own way beautifully.  Find what makes you special in him and hold on tight to it. You are special in the eyes of God and God wants you to understand him for you. You've heard enough testimonies that send your heart running to the Father for him to then write yours. With finding him for you, this is a testimony within itself to share. Go in peace, for you now will seek and believe that Jesus in indeed the savior of the world. 

God is just that in love with you. (even in your tough seasons)

It's simple. God is just that in love with you. What you go through doesn't limit his love for you, perhaps it defines why he is in love. What do I mean? I mean that whatever is happening in your life; know that God is allowing it to happen to 1. discipline you because he LOVES you. | "For the Lord disciplines those who he loves, and he punishes each one that he accepts as his child." Hebrews 12:6  and 2. because he simply has to get out what he has put inside of you.

What is happening is not a surprise to him right now, and to be honest, he is actually quite amused by the wilderness he has caused because he sees beyond your thoughts and actions right now, he sees how you're really going to be bold and confident in him. Isn't that wonderful? To have a God that sees beyond what you're viewing of yourself. He knows you from the beginning to the end because he's your creator. He knows how he wanted to use you and every single thing he has placed inside of you and HOW he will reveal it to you. I don't know about you but that is so exciting and amazing for a God to really see beyond my sin nature to desiring to share with me my full identity in Christ. Some are experiencing it, and some maybe right now don't see what he is seeing because condemnation took its course, but we rebuke in the name of Jesus any condemnation that you have amongst yourselves. Know that God is not sitting there laughing at you while you're going through it, he simply just wants you to relax and let him finish what he started, he caused these test and trials so that you can learn how to rely on him. And because he loves you, he wants you to seek his face first before ever thinking about seeking man and responding base on your feelings.

His unfailing love runs deeps and so does HE inside of you. Because GREATER is HE that is within you. He just wants to activate what he has given you so the operating table is necessary for your good. Surgery is about to get real. So, this new post is for those who aren't comprehending God's unconditionally love for them personally during tough seasons.

Our millions of rants as to why God this? Why God that? Has taken up the time of appreciating why God is actually allowing it. If we're not careful, we will miss what God is teaching throughout those tests and trials. God is always about teaching his children so that we grow from whatever he is pruning out of us. How can we be who God has called us to be if we're running from those uncomfortable situations?

Trust me, I can testify. Being a member of Tennessee State University's Aristocrat of Bands has become more and more uncomfortable, even after being in the band for all 4 years of my college career. It has only been uncomfortable because I just did not fit in to the hype of what everyone else was hip to. I felt alone and did not feel like I had anybody to really relate to, but God is faithful, he gave me a few friends and even ones that aren't necessarily in the band but band managers to talk and relate to. I am extremely grateful. But even with having them, I still wanted out. I wanted to go back to that place of peace because I swore up and down that no matter how I try and prayed I just convinced myself that I could not find peace with this band. But you know what, God gave me such a strong revelation. He told me, "Because I love you, you will remain in this band." I looked puzzled. I said, "Well God, if you loved me, you will understand how I feel and will get me out of this band so that I can recollect my peace somewhere else because this isn't it anymore." and he kept repeating to me that because he loved me, I have to stay there. I was of course angry, confused, and bothered by the response but God always has a divine purpose and plan with everything he says. He gave me the revelation that being in this band again is not about me but for someone else, there is someone that I needed to impact, and he told me that it may be more than one and to just know that I am going to use you for my glory but you must be uncomfortable, you must be in tuned with me, and know that I LOVE YOU through this tough season that I have you in.

I guarantee that he is saying this to you too..."Because I love you, you will remain (fill in the blank)" regardless if it is making you unhappy. For God's glory can be revealed through you if you let him do it in the midst of your unhappiness. Trust me, God knows what doesn't give you peace, but does your feelings matter over God's plan? His purpose needs to be fulfilled through you and if he has called you at such a time as this, he is waiting for you to act upon what he is telling you to do. But our emotions are speaking louder than him. We miss that small whisper of "I love you, just trust me." because we are too busy complaining to him. Be encouraged to know that those unhappy moments are for divine purposes that we can only understand if he seek the Lord for understanding. And in that understanding, he'll lead you into what you have to do and it will eventually find its way to that peace that you've been praying for. Somebody is waiting on the other side of your obedience. Let us rest assured that God will come to terms with telling you his purpose for this tough season right now.

And let me tell you sister or brother, I am STILL currently in this season as we speak. Which means, you're probably still in yours. But know this much, God's loves for you tops everything that you're going through, just keep pushing. You're almost at the finished line. You may not know why God does what he does, but all God wants you to do is trust him even when he gives you the revelation of why you're in that predicament.

God is just that in love with you because he BELIEVES in you. He thought you were worth dying for so he sent his only begotten son on the cross to die for your sins. | John 3:16 |
God is just that in love with you that he had those great plans for you pre-planned before Christ died and that is why he sent his son to die for you because he could not WAIT to share with you all that he had to offer to you.
God is just that in love with you that he will do everything he can to get your attention in wanting that intimate relationship with you.

So why do you think God doesn't love you still during those tough seasons? Why do you think he has left you? What has the enemy twisted your mind with? Be encouraged to know that God still has a plan no matter what, he still is deeply in love with us even when our decisions are sometimes fleshly, he still is willing to forgive us even when we think otherwise, he still is willing to send his grace and mercy even when we feel unworthy. Don't you ever think that God does not care about where you are right now, he simply placed you there so that you can seek him more because he just desperately wants to talk to you because HE is just that in love with you. You matter to him, so honey, this season shall pass, but don't let this season pass without taking the lessons from it. God, of course, would not want his children to miss what is important for you to know. So cheers to tough seasons and knowing that God still loves you unconditionally within it. Cheers to the tears, isolations, and pruning because it is all worth it. God is worth it. HIS LOVE IS BEYOND WORTH IT.

God is just that in love with you that he used me to remind you. His love is equally within us.
I am no different from you, just a vessel who is learning too!

I love you, always!
Love, Desjane McDonald

Future Spouse: Spiritual State

Let's face it, we pray from his/her physical standpoint more than we do spiritual. We earthly envision how our spouse should look like. Don't get me wrong, it's fine to have preferences, but as you spend time praying for that future spouse, God opens your mind to what's more wise to pray for. We can say all day, "God, I want me a man that is 6.0', dark-skin, pretty smile...etc." And totally miss the spiritual warfare that he/she may be going through. God cares more for your heart and the heart of your future spouse.

It is important that we keep in mind of our future spouse's spiritual state because the enemy is out to kill, steal, and destroy. The thought of godly marriages makes him sick, and if you are not covering your future spouse, the enemy will have free-play in your marriage. Let's keep an open mind and heart to the next few pointers I want to help you all start praying for in a spiritual perspective for your future spouse.

1. The Heart

God is the heart beat between the two of you. When the heart is not aligned to his, he takes his time with the individual, to prune and now to prepare, that is why most godly marriages are healthy and happy because they keep their personal relationship with God first and as the center of their marriage. In your praying time, cover his heart in God's hands. Make sure that his heart is not easily led astray and to stand firm as God fights his battles. Temptation may be trying to cloud him/her right now, so pray he'll endure the testing and temptation and to consider it all joy. | James 1:2 | and to know that God will not let your future spouse be tempted beyond what he/she can bear. |1 Corinthians 10:13 | Pray to keep his heart's motives godly and always got his eyes on Christ for direction. While God is working on your heart, have faith he is definitely working on your spouse's.

2. The Mind.

Our minds are so powerful, so we must be careful of what we set our minds to. So, in your praying time, guard your spouse's mind from the enemy's thoughts. God wants the mind just as much as he wants the heart. When we set our minds on things that are heavenly instead of earthly, | Colossians 3:2 | you'll be amazed by what he shows you within his kingdom and what he has for the both of you. Your spouse is able to be all that God has called them to be. The enemy loves to nitpick with your mind during your walk with Christ, so pray that your spouse is filling their mind with things of Christ and not of this world. And hey, during that time of renewing the mind, the prayers about you may be happening, lol. So be consistent in prayer, and rebuke that mind game the enemy likes to play against God's children.

3. The Focus.

Focusing on God is the main discipline that matters. In your praying time, pray for your spouse's focus to remain on their relationship with Christ instead of focusing so much on your future earthly marriage. Yes, your earthly marriage will be a life-changing moment but never the ultimate fulfillment. Jesus Christ is the one who completes you. And your marriage to Christ is the first to be faithful to. Pray for the both of you not to worry about how God is going to bring you two together. Let him finish his master-minded love story. Sit still. Be encouraged. Know that he has heard your prayers and is working. God just wants you and your spouse to be careful not to make marriage become an idol. Pray about it with faith and power, move forward, and keep being about your Father's business.

4. God's Plan.

Oh my! God's amazing plan. In your praying time, pray for the will of your Father within the marriage. Get excited about what God is going to do with the two of you than marriage itself. I can testify to this and say that my heart has smiled by the many prayers of God's will being done within my future marriage. On my heart, I kept feeling and hearing "ministry", so I would begin to cover our ministry in prayer, believing God's vision. Even in the midst of not knowing, I just knew it was going to be for his glory no matter what. So keep on praying for God to use the two of you as such amazing contributors for his kingdom. Let your heart and your future spouses be wrapped up in learning God's will and plan for not only for the two of you, but for yourself in your personal relationship. God is so creative with bring the two together to share the gifts he has given. Let's chase God's plan.

You see, when you pray for God's spiritual blessings on behalf of your future spouse, it gets exciting,
because God is so faithful and when you mind and heart is set on what he wants, you shall receive, trusting that in his timing, he will provide the right person for you. No matter what, keep on covering your spouse. God has BIG things in store for the both of you.